Don't Go In The Woods (2010)A review - by Shlomoh Sherman
December 30, 2013
Don't Go in the Woods (2010)|
Director: Vincent D'Onofrio
Writers: Sam Bisbee (screenplay), Vincent D'Onofrio (story)
Stars: Bo Boddie, Eric Bogosian, Gwynn Galitzer
Plot Keywords: head wound - rock band - french girl
Taglines: Making a hit can be a killer.
Genres: Horror - Musical
Run Time: 83 mins
Release Date: April 16, 2010 (USA)
Production Co: BrooklynHazelhurst Inc.
Plot: Don't Go in the Woods -- A Tribeca Film. Vincent D'Onofrio (LAW & ORDER) directs this twisted musical/horror hybrid.
When a young band takes to the woods to write their first hit song, they find themselves in the midst of a nightmare beyond comprehension.
Who doesn't like Vincent D'Onofrio? I mean, especially as Bobby Goren on CRIMINAL INTENT?
But expecting a good horror movie, all I can say is WTF?
What was D'Onofrio thinking? Is this supposed to be a horror movie or a musical? If a horror movie why so much singing every friggin' five minutes? If a musical, why bill it as a horror movie about a monster in the woods when the monster doesn't show up until the last five minutes of the movie? At least that's when I think it shows up. When there were 10 minutes left to the movie, I had to stop watching it, it was so awful, I mean awful in the modern sense of the word. But every review I have read of this film [oh no, DON'T call in a film; it's barely a movie] says that's when the monster shows up, during the last 5 minutes.
"A young band heads to the woods in order to focus on writing new songs. Hoping to emerge with new music that will score them their big break, they instead find themselves in the middle of a nightmare beyond comprehension.", says one reviewer. But the audience is left in a state of non-comprehension after just 15 minutes into the show.
OK. I get it. Young kids go into the woods where you are told not to go. There is a sign right at the beginning of the show that says DON'T GO INTO THE WOODS! [DUH] OK, the leader doesn't want the group communicating with the outside world while they are seeking artistic inspiration. But to hack their cell phones into pieces is some CHUTSPAH. If it were me, I'd kill him before the monster even showed up. Well maybe "kill" is a bit harsh but shall we say "maim"?
The one saving grace [pardon the Christian turn of phrase] is that I didn't have to pay to see it although I do believe that I had to add a certain amount to my electricity bill.
Vincent, what have you done to us? Are those YOUR kids? Sorry folks but this movie is absolute DREK!
Did You Know?
Vincent D'Onofrio sings the song on the radio in character as country singer George Geronimo Gerkie.
Appearing during the second part of the song "I'm glad I'm Blind", when the bass player Robbie (Nick Thorp) is standing, Robbie's guitar is shown alternately in front of Nick (Matt Sbeglia)'s head, then behind. Two takes of this song, with a different physical arrangement on set, seem to have been edited together, resulting in this odd effect.
Discuss Don't Go in the Woods (2010) on the IMDb message boards
Bo Boddie ... Carson
Eric Bogosian ... Executive
Gwynn Galitzer ... Felicity
Jorgen Jorgensen ... Carlo
Tim Lajcik ... Creature
Soomin Lee ... Johnny
Kate O'Malley ... Callie
Matt Sbeglia ... Nick
Casey Smith ... Anton
Nick Thorp ... Robbie
Ali Tobia ... Melinda
Cassandra Lee Walker ... Ashley