The Tony And Shlomoh Show

Spring, 2005

This Skit will be taped and aired Spring, 2005

Tony: Hey Shlo! We got more Moishevicki stuff. Some Arab found an old newsreel from when they arrested Jesus.

Shlo: No kidding! I gotta see this right away!

Tony: Ok. Roll the clip. Roll the clip. Roll the clip!

Shlo: Hey schmuckface! Didn't you hear what my partner said? ROLL THE FUCKIN' CLIP!

Jesus: Vy did you arrest me?

Pilate: I hoid yu wasa runnin a illegal nonKOSHER deli in Nazaret!

Jesus: Vell dat hag, Magdalene, she made me do it.

Pilate: Yeah yeah! Next ting yu be tellin me she takea dee meat ina da back!

Jesus: Dad friggin Moishevicki got a big mout!

Pilate: he da one what toin yu in?

Jesus: Nah. Dat vuz dat feygeleh Judas. Seymour! Seymour Moishevicki; he's da vun vot like to tell all dee secrets. Big mout MAMZER! And to tink! I healed him of dee syph! Friggin ingrate!

Pilate: Ok ok. Who give ah shit? Marrone! Ok! Since dis you foist offense, we gonna let you off wid a simple crucifixion.

Jesus: Oy vey! You ginnies ok in mine book! Hey! Yu vant I shud toin a little ov yu voter into vine before you nail me up?

Tony: What did you think of that, Shlo?

Shlo: Wow! Now I know why Italians and Jews get along so good.

Tony: [smiles and nods his head] Right!


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